So here we are in Charleston and my last blog entry was to announce our move. A LOT has happened since then and while I will be continuing my food blog NoPoliticsJustFood very soon I thought I would also write about the stages of moving for our family. Things did move pretty fast when we put our home in Amherst, MA of 14 years up for sale and I thought I had more time to see and do last minute things we’ve always wanted to do the reality was the whole moving and buying process was tedious and emotional, more than I thought. When I moved to Amherst 14 years ago I honestly don’t remember feeling as much disconnection but once I moved here I remembered that I was a Mom with young babes so that kept me busy and distracted. The things that got me through that time of my life was the fact I knew my neighbors before moving to the street, and I also benefited from the Amherst Family Center.
We struggled in Amherst to find a church home for a long time and and yet as we left our church family like we did when we left New York City with the biggest of hugs and tears.
Saying goodbye was hard. To my colleagues and work, to my close neighbors, to long time Mom friends and to friends that are and will always be like family to me. I knew it would be hard, but I’ve been on the planet long enough now to know that when you do something big like move farthest from where you grew up you just simply wouldn’t do it if all the negatives came to light right away. I’ve never lived in the south so it’s a completely a different culture here and one night I said to Steven it feels like we’ve moved to another country. He’s done that moving from Australia to NYC and he agrees and although moving from Australia to New York City seemed like a snap all those years ago I still am mystified that he left such a beautiful country to pursue a relationship with me and a career in photography. Steven came with a bag of CDs, some cameras and a suitcase of clothes. Needless to say this move was a LOT different!
We actually had a nightmare of an actual move. Many of my FB friends know about what went down but I can assure you I only highlighted some of the details. This actually took a lot of emotional real estate up for me because it was so stressful. I can’t thank enough my church family for supporting us by watching our kids when we were dealing with movers at 4:30am. I think Wendy Roszazza is a saint. I keep thinking of things to give her, but there’s simply nothing large enough other than to pray for her blind and deaf dog to never go missing ever again in his life. Watching my kids say goodbye to their friends was utterly heartbreaking but when I started driving away the morning of our departure sobbing in Ludlow Massachusetts because it was all too real my son rubbed my back and said, “You can do this Mom…I’ll do it with you.” That’s when I knew my stepping out in faith was worn on my sleeve because I don’t know if my kids realized how much we had decided to allow God to uproot in our lives. If anyone does gardening you’ll know there are different kinds of plants and some take to the soil quicker than others. There’s a palm tree in my yard and I haven’t a clue how to take care of it…I guess that’s what google’s for!
During the drive down to Charleston we weren’t expecting to be on the road on the fourth of July but we took a drive down the Skyline Drive in the Shenandoah National Park. We stayed in probably the worst roach infested motel which my kids thought we had lost our marbles and we explained many families actually LIVE in motels like this so shush up and enjoy the free bacon at breakfast. I anointed the bed free of bed bugs and once I was in bed I only wore flip flops to the bathroom…I encouraged everyone to do the same. The entire experience was forgotten about once we started the journey up the mountains and meandered through the most spectacular views of the Shenandoah Valley from the national park. I knew it would be while before I’d see mountains again. That also tugged at my heart because as much as I love the ocean, I also love the mountains. We live in an amazing country with diverse topography and what better way of spending the fourth of July than driving through a national park? I did get to see two huge black bears that Steven had to stop his car to let cross the road…we also stopped at the peak elevation and went to the museum exhibit about the making of national park. Many families were displaced, evicted from their land to build the park which I found particularly tragic with the means and propaganda in how they did it. That’s a whole other blog post someday. The fourth of July being a weird one I was all worried my kids were not having a good time and we would miss fireworks etc. But when I returned to our hotel with take out burgers a couple of rowdy southerners sitting on the hotel patio asked if my kids wanted to light off some roman candles as they pointed to huge pile of fireworks that they were planning on setting off…the look on my kid’s faces says it all.
We arrived in Charleston and closed on our home, and of course waited a couple days for our moving truck to deliver our stuff. It’s weird sitting in an empty new house. Regardless of how nice a home is, the niceness or newness doesn’t make it home. Making any place home take investment, relationship building and personalizing. We sat on the floor one afternoon during a rainstorm and joked that we liked not having Wifi because our kids talked to us. Upon our truck delivery many of our boxes were crushed, and as I said to my Mom one box is like Christmas and another is like devastation. Sometimes I open a box and think…why did I bring that? And some things I thought…eh I don’t know but last minute it got tossed on the truck. Like the wicker love seat I sit on every morning listening to Mr. Greenjeans. We’ve unpacked the essentials and it’s taken a while but we are functional but not organized or nor decorative. My theory was if we can get the kitchen functional at least I can make a meal etc. It’s amazing to see what we actually “need” in life and it’s no surprise it’s a LOT less than we seem to carry around all our life. Upon coming down here we learned that our next door neighbor’s home caught fire and luckily she and her 90 year old mother are safe, their house is severely damaged as well as their belongings. She will be displaced for months maybe over a year. I am sure losing her favorite next door neighbors and her home must be hard. I keep thinking about those families that had to be uprooted to build a national park for all of “us” to enjoy. Devastation, disconnection and displacement comes in different ways but I’m sure the emotions are very similar. 
We are enjoying exploring our new town or city- the people are friendly. I feel like I’m wide eyed and a deer caught in headlights…so of course I say, “I’m new here…” and at Trader Joe’s I got a free South Carolina bag! The familiar products is comforting for us all. It’s true Charleston is hot and humid. My new favorite place in this house is my screened in porch. Early in the morning, having coffee and just listening to the tree frogs is just soul healing. There’s one that hangs out behind our speakers and so I named him Mr. Greenjeans. That tells you what generation I’m from if you know who Mr. Greenjeans actually IS. I’m actually acclimating to the 90% humidity, constant thunder rumblings of early mornings and weathering through the hot beating sun with a wide brimmed hat and sunglasses. It’s probably going to be my trademark “look”. I’ve seen people wear jeans though in 98 degree humid days…I think are they insane or just aliens from another planet? The Moms here dress very feminine and I ponder how and why do women wear high heels to drop off their kids to camp? Will I conform to Lilly Pulitzer preppy dresses and large fern printed caftans? Probably not. That’s the great thing about living in a place that you swim in the opposite direction for fourteen years…you get used to sticking out like dog’s bollocks and you don’t give a rip. In Amherst people love the au natural look and honestly I appreciate that as there’s no pressure to look like a botox babe making a dive for a case of peach bellini at Trader Joe’s.
We’ve made some connections at our new church Seacoast but it’s very large and overwhelming. The second week we went we lost the boys because apparently there’s a lot of Pokemon stops at Seacoast. The boys were given the opportunity to go to teen summer camp which was an absolute blessing because they came home with instant friends. I’ve soldiered through registering the boys for school and announcing that there is a strict dress code as well as summer reading they need to do. Jonah thought I was bluffing and I had to show him the sheet of paper to prove that YES he will need to use his brain this summer. It seems like things are falling into place somewhat, however we know it’s not going to feel like home overnight. For years we’ve lived in a place that valued community and intimacy and there’s glimmers of that here, but it definitely is different. Those of my friends know that we are gifted in hospitality- so it only took a week of me being here to invite another Mom and her three boys who moved here last month over for ice cream. When you move to town with kids you need emergency contact numbers. Moving over summer vacation for kids is hard regardless of the kid. God is good, and he has shown us many things in this process and provided for our needs in every capacity including a connection here and there just when one of us has needed it most. We do miss our friends dearly and our neighbors (maybe not the college drunk neighbors) and of course the funniest thing about moving to this neighborhood is most of our neighbors have some tie to New England and are die hard Patriots and Sox fans so I guess that’s a good start in feeling at home here.
So my lucyingrace blog will soon become a little more active as I take to writing more so I hope more of my friends will subscribe to that and I’m excited about getting back to my NoPoliticsJustFood blog with some southern twists and I look forward to cooking from my new southern cookbook Smoke&Pickles my Uncle Chef Tim and Marcie sent me. So be sure to subscribe and share!
Goodbye for now ya’ll-
lucyingrace
Lucy in Grace 